Compulsive Writing

Its been only three days since I determined that it was time to return to the writing life. Already I fear I may need counselling.

Natalie Goldberg, in her wonderful book Old Friend from Far Away, suggests that we prime the pump with I remember.... Initially I thought this was a great idea but now I find I am 'automatic writing' as my mind commands my fingers on the keyboard without any consultation with ME. Thus far I have pages and pages of memory lists and one tiny story which has yet to mature. Do I continue my lists? Try to force a real story? Abandon all hope? Continue to let it flow? You are my counsellor and I hear you asking "What do you want?"

Thank you wise one. I know now what to do.

The lists of I remember... feel good to me and so far my internal editor has been forced into inactivity because there are no sentences, structure, or plot to impede me. The lack of criticism from my internal task master allows me to feel more confident about what is to come. The real treasure in this process is the characters that are coming back into my life. There were some very fine humans in my history and some devilishly bad ones. I am enjoying meeting them again. I think I will continue, for awhile, to indulge this delicious process. As a counter balance, I promise to continue to create small stories that will someday grow up to be full tales of life.